How Artificial Intelligence can save Santa

When December arrives, across the world, children take out their pen and paper to begin the annual tradition of writing to Father Christmas.

So begins Santa’s work for another year, but it is a year like no other. Artificial Intelligence has seen to that.

With the arrival of the first envelope, the North Pole shifts into gear, and the sleigh comes out of the garage for its annual inspection. The latest technology allows for any minor faults to be picked up before they become major ones and adds that extra level of security on the long flight ahead.

AI has been a boon in the elves’ workshop and taken a lot of pressure off the big man himself. Predictive analytics has already been at work, figuring out what the most popular gifts are likely to be and allowing the workshop to get ahead of the toy-making process.

And with modern manufacturing equipment, AI monitors the production line and can analyse and prevent problems when assembling toys, creating high-quality, safe products to the latest standards. Stock-taking and warehouse inventory is now available at the click of a button, meaning there will always be the correct amount of stock for demand.

Automated software reads letters at top speed and categorises them by gift requested, time zone and child’s behaviour. Nowadays, children can expect a reply when they write a letter to Santa – something that was simply impossible before AI. Cyber security has also been stepped up at Santa HQ, keeping the personal details, hopes and wishes of the world’s children safe behind security firewalls and preventing data leaks.

Speaking of which, the trusty ‘naughty and nice’ list can now be analysed and run through a global database with real-time updates and alerts, ensuring no good child is forgotten. An automatic scoring system can calculate the average behaviour score over the year and ensure a fair chance for every child.

And when Christmas Eve comes around, and Father Christmas sets off on his epic journey, he can rest assured that he has every convenience in place to make the ride as smooth as possible. Electric power on the EV sleigh can give the reindeer a break if needed, especially now that rapid chargers are available for a quick pit stop, reducing the risk of being discovered.

Sat Nav has been on Santa’s system for many years, enabling NORAD to track him around the globe and speeding up his operations. But there are times when it can lead him down a wrong turn, where all he has for reference are road signs in a language he doesn’t speak. Automatic language translation can now assist him to read signs when he needs to and get himself back onto the correct route quickly. He also finds it easier now to communicate with any people he bumps into on his route, though he still doesn’t allow any selfies or videos.

Facial recognition software allows him to correctly identify children, select their gifts and have them ready to deposit under the tree or in the stocking without any concern over mixing up twins or giving the wrong gifts to a child staying over at a relative’s house.

And Santa can monitor his own vital stats as he journeys around the world, keeping an eye on his heart rate and hydration level, counting his steps and monitoring his temperature. He can receive alerts when his blood sugar dips so he can grab a piece of mince pie at the next house. These days, his blood alcohol level is also monitored – worth bearing in mind as you decide whether to leave him some milk or sherry.

By the time the last presents are delivered and the sleigh turns and heads for home, the automated chat bots back at HQ are already dealing with queries and returns from those parts of the world where Christmas morning has already begun.

When the sleigh lands back on the runway at the North Pole, he can enjoy a hearty breakfast and a guilt-free glass of manzanilla. Technology has helped him through another festive season, but the best things in life don’t need AI.

Comms Team
About the author

The Ennis & Co Comms Team

Related Posts

Leave a Reply